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Uma Thurman is the latest victim in WTF Happened to your Face Online Frenzy

02.12.2015by: Cherry Liquor

Uma Thurman is only 44-years old (due to turn 45 this April) but she's been around for what feels like forever. I grew up watching her play Venus in THE ADVENTURES OF BARON MUNCHAUSEN, Mrs. Mia Wallace in PULP FICTION and Poison Ivy in BATMAN NIPPLES & ROBIN HOMOSEXUAL UNDERTONES. Now Uma is promoting "The Slap" (which looks more dreadful than the face everyone keeps saying is "unrecognizable") and man, have the sharks come out. But here's the thing: Thurman has never been a symmetrical beauty. She has never been classically gorgeous. And she has never before been subjected to such high-definition scrutiny.

Here's what happens when you live a life: you age. Thurman has been married and divorced twice, has had a few kids, has been a smoker who grew up raised by a couple of hippies (her mom was once married briefly to LSD god, Timothy Leary and her father was the first Westerner to become a Tibetan Buddhist monk). Add all of that onto a beauty of character and shit will move around a bit.

However, mix in the added unfair and gender-biased stress of needing to maintain a certain look in order to remain employed and you have Botox in the forehead (a wide and high one that she previously had covered with bangs/fringe) and makeup designed to help you withstand the intensity that being filmed in high definition brings and well... it all makes Uma Thurman of 2015 look way different from Uma Thurman of the 1990's. No one is shining a bright light on ex-husband Ethan Hawke's dramatically aged, crack-addict looking face. That guy hasn't looked "normal" in years and yet now he gets to swim in the Oscar pool instead of be featured on trending threads about his brow line. 

I write a lot about women who are insanely attractive. Ever notice how we tend to feature the exact same women over and over again? That's because statistically speaking, the impossibly good-looking people are in the minority. In 20 years, how many of them will get their turn at being relevant only so that blog and "news" sites can have filler on a slow news day? Probably fewer than those who will have had as interesting and varied career as Uma's.

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Source: Daily Mail

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