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Marry/Date/Friend: Emily Blunt vs Felicity Jones vs Keira Knightley

01.10.2018by: Cherry Liquor

Last time we strolled down the Marry/Date/Friend lane, it was between Adrianne Palicki, Gemma Arterton and Jaimie Alexander and while most of you were in agreement with my assessment that Gemma was marriage material, it was Jaimie that you wanted to date and Adrianne that you would prefer to have as a friend. In any combo, those choices couldn't have been too wrong.

This week, with the release of PADDINGTON 2, I thought we could look at 3 British babes that we'd like to cuddle with like our own personal fluffy pet.

Marry: Your forever gal, for better or worse.

Date: Your temporary gal, to have fun with but eventually walk away from.

Friend: Your best buddy gal, with whom you have all the laughs but none of the "benefits."

Emily Blunt


Multi-Talented - She's a great actress who also has the chops to work as a supermodel and the pipes to sing on par with Adele. You wouldn't get tired of looking at her or listening to her.

Tough Side - While Blunt has often teetered on the too skinny vibe for me, she also has that action hero vibe that allows her to put on some muscle and realistically kick some ass.

Down to Earth - While she's easily a glamourous British babe in couture when you see her on the red carpet, seeing Blunt strip down and wear her athletic gear while working out with her hubby proves that she doesn't need to be fancy, she just looks really good doing it.


That Dimpled Chin - There are times when Emily's chin dent looks super sexy and others when it comes off too manly in the wrong light. I find myself constantly waffling between the two when looking at her.

Constantly Working - Blunt is one of the most sought after actresses right now, which is both excellent and daunting, in case you're into having one-on-one personal time with your woman on the daily. I don't mind but some of you clingy mofos would throw a fit.

Former Buble babe - I don't know what it is about that Michael Buble fellow but he gives me the creeps. Knowing that Emily was in a 3 year relationship with him (and that he stupidly cheated on her) takes a little lustre off of her shine.


 From what I've seen, Emily Blunt is wildly talented, totally modest and exceptionally funny & smart in an industry not necessarily known for elevating those traits. Plus, who wouldn't want to say that they'd hooked Mary Poppins?

Keira Knightley


A-List Status - It's awfully superficial of me to consider the fact that Keira's high ranking status in Hollywood is a major perk to being with her but who wouldn't want to skip to the front of the line if they had the opportunity?

Versatile - Keira can do period dramas, modern action flicks, singing, dancing, acting like a woman child... her options are limitless. Which means that your options with her probably would be too.

Ageless - Out of the 3 women here, Keira is the youngest by a couple of years. She's strangely held on to this ageless look where she's looked essentially the same for the past 15 years, which might have the Fountain of Youth affect on your relationship with her too.


Too Skinny - At the start of her career, Knightley looked naturally skinny. As she's gone on with the acting thing, she's gotten even thinner, an effect that hasn't been kind on her body overall, including reducing her already small chest.

Johnny Depp - Have whatever feelings you want about his public messy breakup with Amber Heard, Depp is no longer the cool dude he once was and Keira will be associated with him forever more due to the PIRATES franchise.

On-Going Flirtation with Dourness - There seems to have been some turning point that I missed in Keira's life path, but she has lost some of her beaming happy light she used to have. I guess we could attribute some of that to growing up or perhaps a big head from the gain in fame.


I don't know if the sex would be crazy good with Keira but I had a hard time figuring out where I wanted to put her in this match up. I don't see her as good friend material and I definitely don't think I'd want to be married to her but a brief torrid relationship seems doable.

Felicity Jones


Cute As a Button - Felicity has a sweet doll-like appearance that goes seamlessly hand-in-hand with her sharp fashion model features. Like a work of art that you wouldn't get tired looking at.

Former Child Actress Done Right - I've noticed that there are 2 ways a child star can go - absolutely self-absorbed and detached from reality, sometimes resulting in bouts of total crazy or the kind where they quit the business, go to school and then come back to the industry a wiser, sharper individual. Being with someone who can separate the two but still get you in the posh parties? Score!

Star Wars - There was a good deal of fanfare for ROGUE ONE but not nearly as close to what the recent trilogy has presented. Her movie and character were classier, like the cousin who's the smarter, more attractive member of the family you're always bragging about being related to.


Buck Teeth - Her looks are both adorable & almost too child-like because of those teeth. I love it and yet feel a bit like perv for loving it.

Rising Star - While she was widely praised for her role in THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING, Jones still has some distance to go before she bridges the gap between her level of fame and Knightley's or Blunt's. This means a lot of hard work and long nights where you might not have contact with her.

Star Wars - After all of the junk talked on the internet by the supposed fans of the franchise, making me hate that demo even more than I already was inclined to, being attached to that universe cuts both ways.


She's cute, she's sharp, she's well-balanced, she's a great friend with some awesome access into the entertainment world. Definitely a good choice of bestie.

Now, let's hear your choices!


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