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Marry/Date/Friend: Amber Heard vs Emilia Clarke vs Katharine McPhee

11.15.2017by: Cherry Liquor

While the feedback from the last Marry/Date/Friend was mixed on the site, over at our Facebook page, a surprising number of people chose to marry Michelle Williams. I had figured that everyone would be all about locking down the Duff booty but it seems as if that ass is just a pit stop and people would rather spend more time with an actress (Dunst was more popular as a marriage/date option than a friend) who has junk in more than just her trunk.

I've already featured a number of the actresses from superhero movies but the one I've left out so far is appearing in JUSTICE LEAGUE this week and I figured why not throw in an American Idol and a mother of all dragons to battle off on who's the tastiest morsel in the bunch.

Marry: Your forever gal, for better or worse.

Date: Your temporary gal, to have fun with but eventually walk away from.

Friend: Your best buddy gal, with whom you have all the laughs but none of the "benefits."

Emilia Clarke

Pros:

Spunky - I love to watch interviews with Emilia Clarke. She's never short on stories about the things she gets up to (I love her valley girl impression) and tells them so animatedly that you know you could get into serious trouble with her and it would be the best fun you've ever had.

Cute Little Onion - Khaleesis are like ogres, they're full of layers. Or perhaps that's just Emilia, who can take on different roles as easily as one might change channels (does anyone actually do that anymore?). Being flexible makes her more employable - and definitely more interesting in the long haul.

No Wall Flower - While she's explained that it wasn't exactly easy to do all those nude scenes as a relatively unknown new face during the first season of Game of Thrones, she has to get props for diving right in and steering her own career with her fearlessness.

Cons:

Game of Thrones - Some people are going to see her involvement in the series as being a plus side to being with her but I've seen the diehard fans of that show and they creep me the f*ck out. The biggest downside to being with Clarke would be dealing with those people for-ev-ah.

Clumsy - Emilia did some damage to her foot during filming and has been known to be a bit wobbly at times, which is both endearing and annoying, if you're constantly nursing someone's bum something or other.

Those Eyebrows - I both love that Clarke has embraced her full ocular hats because those overly done eyebrows can be positively terrifying, but at the same time, I feel as if they give her a Wookie-in-her-ancestry sorta vibe.

OUR CHOICE: MARRY

 Emilia Clarke is adorable, fit, fun, smart, charming and has an awesome career in front of her. Aside from the fans being persistent, I can't see much of a downside to putting a ring on this dragon mama.

Katharine McPhee

Pros:

Brick House - McPhee has talked about battling an eating disorder because she was told she was too big during her time right before appearing on American Idol. Honestly, she's one of the few women in Hollywood who looks good even when her weight is fluctuating. There's something awesome about having a hearty ass to grab onto, don'tcha think?

Dog Lover - I don't trust people who don't like dogs. I also admire that Kat puts her time in with rescue charities and has adopted older dogs as a part of her commitment to being the angelic person she is.

That Voice - The one thing that Katherine McPhee has failed to do after appearing on a TV talent show about singing is generate enough buzz as a singer. We know her from movies, we know her from looking hot, but rarely does the focus get put on her musical career or just how gawddamn well she sings.

Cons:

Hot & Cold - McPhee seems to like to fall in love. And out of it. She's been bouncing around in relationships from the moment we met her, including her propensity for falling for work colleagues.

Constantly On the Cusp - Scorpion is the first project that we've seen Katharine do that has been strongly successful for her post-Idol. Once that show goes, I wonder where her career will head.

Low Self Esteem - If the regular merry-go-round of partners doesn't say it and the eating disorder past doesn't say it, perhaps the plastic surgery (while she hasn't admitted it, there are strong indicators that her bustline didn't get bigger because of a lack of fitness) will. There's nothing less attractive than constantly propping up a person who never feels attractive enough.

OUR CHOICE: DATE

I had to think hard about this one because Katharine McPhee is one of my favorite hotties but she has a bit too much baggage drama for me to consider being with long term. Still, she is gorgeous, sexy, nice and a talented singer. I could live with that for the limited time she'd give me.

Amber Heard

Pros:

Bisexual - I won't say that bisexual women are hotter because I've known a lot of them who are ugly as sin and even less appealing on the inside (perhaps they're hedging their bets?) but I will say that bisexual women have far fewer hangups about sex than most.

Aquaman - Being close to Amber would get me closer to Jason Momoa. There is zero downside to that.

Baby, Can I Drive Your Car? - That '68 Mustang is boss. And even if she doesn't give me express permission to drive it, she can't stay awake forever.

Cons:

Johnny Depp - I hesitated putting Amber on this because I figured there would be boys chewing her up after the public blowout from her marriage to Johnny Depp. The negative haze from that mess is daunting, indeed.

Forever a B-lister - I actually like Amber as an actress but she's struggled to find solid footing with roles, leaving her to mainly be known as Johnny Depp's ex-wife, prior to booking Mera, which I doubt is going to be her big breakout.

Above the Law - She smuggled dogs into Australia, lied on paperwork and the whole mess going on with the producers of LONDON FIELDS (don't start reading up about it if you're not already following it, the shit just spirals out of control and still hasn't been resolved yet) lead me to believe that Amber is either a little too dumb or a little too manipulative for her own good.

OUR CHOICE: FRIEND

I think the stories Amber Heard could tell would be interesting to listen to, regardless of the degree of truth behind them. She's got a great car, though. I still wanna drive that car.

Now, let's hear your choices!

Source: IMDB

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