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06.12.2013by: Cherry Liquor

Top 10 Best Booties in the Biz

We talk about boobs a lot around here. With the Boobies of the Day being a mainstay feature of this former fledgling portion of the JoBlo empire (who woulda thought that people would discover that clicking over to hot women in various degrees of dress and undress could garner so much attention after some time?) you'd think that we're all about the handfuls to the smotherables. Yet at the same time, there are a lot of Schmoes who talk about the tail end of these women, so here is my Top Ten list of the Best Booties in the Biz.

10 - Adriana Lima

She supposedly was a virgin until she got married and instantly became pregnant with her first child. For a Victoria's Secret lingerie model, I can see how that story would be hard to believe. Looking at her out-of-this-world body also makes it that much harder to swallow. Oh, and this pose of her ass up, looking for a plowing? Well, it was probably taken after she was married. Right? (Jeez... dat ass!!)

9 - Gabrielle Union

We simply do not see enough of Gabrielle Union's ass, which is the only reason that I don't have her higher ranked on this list. From that strip tease scene in CRADLE 2 THE GRAVE, where the red lace of her lingerie looked as if they were trying to make a permanent home on her cheeks to images like this one, I say it again and loudly: WE NEED MORE UNION ASS!

8 - Charisma Carpenter

She might have a bit of plastic help in her chest, but I think that Charisma Carpenter was born with an ass that begged to be evened out with a surgeon's careful hand. There are a lot of great images of Carpenter all over the internet. She's sexy, MILFtastic and all around hot. But this image of her showing her ass in those fishnets? That's a part of Hollywood history. NO ONE I know can forget this pic.

7 - Eva Mendes

In the very beginning of when I was watching Eva Mendes in movies, I wasn't a fan. Then, convincing myself that STUCK ON YOU looked funny, I found out that it was - ONLY for Eva. From that point on, from the comedies to the dramas to the actions to whatever the hell genre you'd place THE SPIRIT in, when she was luxurious as the beguiling Sand Saref, I have had a big girl boner for Mendes. The fact that she's got a fairly realistic body for a woman in movies including her taut, well-formed hind quarters, doesn't hurt either.

6 - Maria Menounos

I really would have put Maria higher on the list but there's just so many awesome asses to choose from, I started throwing up my hands and thinking, "They're all number 1!" A thin woman with a smile wider than her torso and an ass that sprang forth from the Greek heavens, I want to know Maria Menounos. I want to hang out with her. I want a chance to grab her ass in that girl grabbing another girl's ass playful sorta way.

5 - Sofia Vergara

Sofia is known more for her upfront attributes than her posterior, but long before she became the household sitcom ethnic stereotypical second wife on TV, she was a model who wore bikinis, flashed ass and had blonde hair. After being turned down for too many roles because she "sounded" ethnic from her accent but didn't "look ethnic enough," the darker shade came in, the roles came coming and she's become an icon for voluptuous women entering their 40's. A MILF, a hysterically funny woman (look up any interview she's done on any show - Chelsea Handler's was one of my favorites where she ragged harder on Chelsea than I think the drunk blonde knew how to handle) and a possessor of an unforgettable booty.

4 - Vida Guerra

You ever notice how things are unfair in life? Some of the coolest chicks you'll ever run into will range from average looking to pretty uniquely ugly. Some of the chicks with the best bodies will have a grill that sends you for the hills. With Vida Guerra, she's got a great ass but she's so plastic in other regards with a face that I personally don't care for. But I will not, cannot, overlook the fact that she has a rump that stumps my brain.

3 - Coco

Hate if you must, I don't mind. When I first stumbled upon pics of Nicole "Coco" Austin on the arm of Ice-T about 11-12 years ago, I wondered where he found that cartoon character of a woman. There was no possible way that she, or her ass, could be for real. Then I started watching "Ice Loves Coco" one night because I didn't have anything else to watch and I was... under the influence... and couldn't muster the energy to change the channel. And I fell in love with her. She's crazy, as Ice says, but a harmless kind of crazy. I might not want to possess her gluteus maximus, but I love her big ass crazy self.

2 - Beyonce

If I were a black woman, I would want Beyonce's booty. I'd want her money. I wouldn't want her husband, even if he is talented, because I just don't find him to be all that interesting of a person. (Not to mention, dare I say? Fugly.) It gives me pause that since Miss Bootylicious has been with him for so long that she might not be all that interesting of a person. Gorgeous, talented, bangin' in back? Sure. But I'm never going to score a BFF role in her life, so I'll never know for sure what kind of a person she is.

1 - Jessica Biel

I wanted to be Jessica Biel after I saw how tough she got for BLADE TRINITY. Sure, I might have originally tuned into that one because I was still nursing my Ryan Reynolds crush hard (damn you, GREEN LANTERN!) but the top tier butt in my book is the one that I wish I could have. Since I'm a white girl, yes, I am trumping many other well-booty-endowed babes to gold medal the booty which I covet the most. I can't be 100% wrong on this choice, right?

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7:42PM on 06/13/2013

Daaaayyyymmmmmnnnn!!!!!

So far the best. Dat ass is a thing of extreme beauty. WOW!
So far the best. Dat ass is a thing of extreme beauty. WOW!
Your Reply:



3:02PM on 06/13/2013

Jennifer Lopez

The fact that Jennifer Lopez isn't on this list is insulting.
The fact that Jennifer Lopez isn't on this list is insulting.
Your Reply:



+8
1:52AM on 06/13/2013
Where the hell is my girl Shakira!?!? :)
Where the hell is my girl Shakira!?!? :)
Your Reply:



2:18PM on 06/13/2013
The hips dont lie and deserve a place on the list.
The hips dont lie and deserve a place on the list.
+1
1:49AM on 06/13/2013

Gotta Agree With Cherry

JB's ass is proportionate to the rest of her body and firm enough to crack walnuts. To all the naysayers - you'd love it if you saw it in real life. Some of the other asses in this list are too big for the body they're attached to.
Jessica's ass is juust riight!
JB's ass is proportionate to the rest of her body and firm enough to crack walnuts. To all the naysayers - you'd love it if you saw it in real life. Some of the other asses in this list are too big for the body they're attached to.
Jessica's ass is juust riight!
Your Reply:



+1
1:41AM on 06/13/2013

Still Smokin' Hot...

After cranking out two (2) kids! That's one of my favorite photos of her.
After cranking out two (2) kids! That's one of my favorite photos of her.
Your Reply:



11:29PM on 06/12/2013
is quickly gained a spot on my all time great hotties list....her body and personality are awesome
is quickly gained a spot on my all time great hotties list....her body and personality are awesome
Your Reply:



11:28PM on 06/12/2013
is quickly gained a spot on my all time great hotties list....her body and personality are awesome
is quickly gained a spot on my all time great hotties list....her body and personality are awesome
Your Reply:



+5
10:19PM on 06/12/2013
Kate Beckinsale should be right up there with Jessica Biel. She's the reason leather pants were invented.
Kate Beckinsale should be right up there with Jessica Biel. She's the reason leather pants were invented.
Your Reply:



+6
7:38PM on 06/12/2013
While there are certainly some fine posteriors here , you could take out Beyonce (please) and a couple of others , and insert Olga Kurylenko , Scarlett Johansson and Sasha Grey , who possesses what may be the finest ass on the planet .
While there are certainly some fine posteriors here , you could take out Beyonce (please) and a couple of others , and insert Olga Kurylenko , Scarlett Johansson and Sasha Grey , who possesses what may be the finest ass on the planet .
Your Reply:



-13
7:24PM on 06/12/2013
Can't believe Nicole Kidman isn't on this list. I think her ass is superior to any of the women on this list. I think softcore star Mindy Vega probably has the best ass I've ever seen.
Can't believe Nicole Kidman isn't on this list. I think her ass is superior to any of the women on this list. I think softcore star Mindy Vega probably has the best ass I've ever seen.
Your Reply:



7:19PM on 06/12/2013
When you said "Best Booties In The Biz", I thought you meant, THE REAL BIZ. There's probably 100 Porn Stars, that have far superior asses to these ass-hacks... (although Sofia Vergara is an exception).

You all can thumb me down all you want, but the truth is the truth.
When you said "Best Booties In The Biz", I thought you meant, THE REAL BIZ. There's probably 100 Porn Stars, that have far superior asses to these ass-hacks... (although Sofia Vergara is an exception).

You all can thumb me down all you want, but the truth is the truth.
Your Reply:



+2
6:49PM on 06/12/2013
Plastic fantastic!!!
Plastic fantastic!!!
Your Reply:



6:11PM on 06/12/2013

Huh?

Whats with this strange fascination with Jessica Biel's ass on movie hotties? She's a good looking woman but posses no ASS, I get that the writer is a fan but the NO.1 spot, come on, don't be silly. Most latin women walking down the street are packing something more special in their trunk.
Whats with this strange fascination with Jessica Biel's ass on movie hotties? She's a good looking woman but posses no ASS, I get that the writer is a fan but the NO.1 spot, come on, don't be silly. Most latin women walking down the street are packing something more special in their trunk.
Your Reply:



1:35AM on 06/14/2013
Not all of us like the larger booty. I'm a huge fan of compact and muscular.
Not all of us like the larger booty. I'm a huge fan of compact and muscular.
7:17PM on 06/12/2013
I agree, it's nothing special.
I agree, it's nothing special.
6:05PM on 06/12/2013
That 'plastic help' was plastic fantastic but got to give the butt credit too.
That 'plastic help' was plastic fantastic but got to give the butt credit too.
Your Reply:



4:00PM on 06/12/2013
I like most of the choices but I would have found a spot for Scarlett Johansson.
I like most of the choices but I would have found a spot for Scarlett Johansson.
Your Reply:



1:17PM on 06/12/2013
Good List but I would have put Olga Kurylenko somewhere on that list
Good List but I would have put Olga Kurylenko somewhere on that list
Your Reply:



12:54PM on 06/12/2013
That recent pic of her in the black lycra pants was amazing.
That recent pic of her in the black lycra pants was amazing.
Your Reply:



12:54PM on 06/12/2013
In the words (well, word) of Grumpy cat: "No."
In the words (well, word) of Grumpy cat: "No."
Your Reply:



12:53PM on 06/12/2013
That infamous wardrobe malfunction on Emmy night was a Godsend.
That infamous wardrobe malfunction on Emmy night was a Godsend.
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12:48PM on 06/12/2013
I hope she returns to the Fast and Furious franchise.
I hope she returns to the Fast and Furious franchise.
Your Reply:



12:44PM on 06/12/2013
Now that 's a position any guy would get behind.
Now that 's a position any guy would get behind.
Your Reply:



12:43PM on 06/12/2013
Definitely the right choice. Well deserved.
Definitely the right choice. Well deserved.
Your Reply:



12:42PM on 06/12/2013
She would have been my number one with Biel as a close second.
She would have been my number one with Biel as a close second.
Your Reply:



12:16PM on 06/12/2013

Biel's booty is quite nice
Biel's booty is quite nice
Your Reply:



+2
10:47AM on 06/12/2013
Great #1 choice!really cant argue with it.
Great #1 choice!really cant argue with it.
Your Reply:



7:45PM on 06/12/2013
Yes you can.
Yes you can.
+1
10:42AM on 06/12/2013
One of my all time favorites.I'll check out any movie she's in.
One of my all time favorites.I'll check out any movie she's in.
Your Reply:



+2
10:39AM on 06/12/2013
A very underrated hottie
A very underrated hottie
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10:03AM on 06/12/2013

Agree To Disagree

While I tend to agree most times with Ms. Liquor, the saucy minx, I must disagree with some of this list. Jessica is a great #1 but Maria and Sophia should be 2 and 3, respectfully. Beyonce would not be in my top 10...and no Kate Hudson or Mena Suvari??
While I tend to agree most times with Ms. Liquor, the saucy minx, I must disagree with some of this list. Jessica is a great #1 but Maria and Sophia should be 2 and 3, respectfully. Beyonce would not be in my top 10...and no Kate Hudson or Mena Suvari??
Your Reply:



9:58AM on 06/12/2013

Agree To Disagree

While I tend to agree most times with Ms. Liquor, the saucy minx, I must disagree with some of this list. Jessica is a great #1 but Maria and Sophia should be 2 and 3, respectfully. Beyonce would not be in my top 10...and no Kate Hudson or Mena Suvari??
While I tend to agree most times with Ms. Liquor, the saucy minx, I must disagree with some of this list. Jessica is a great #1 but Maria and Sophia should be 2 and 3, respectfully. Beyonce would not be in my top 10...and no Kate Hudson or Mena Suvari??
Your Reply:



+1
9:52AM on 06/12/2013
Cherry, instead of playfully grabbing her ass like girls do would it not be better/more playful to use yours also to bump into her's (also like girls do)? I don't know from your perspective but that seems better all around.
Cherry, instead of playfully grabbing her ass like girls do would it not be better/more playful to use yours also to bump into her's (also like girls do)? I don't know from your perspective but that seems better all around.
Your Reply:



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