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01.20.2016by: Cherry Liquor

The Top 10 Sexiest Celebrity Grandmas

Are you ready for some DIRTY GRANDPA? Whether you like it or not, Robert De Niro has moved on from being a sociopath cabbie, gritty gangster and otherwise young badass and is now settling for the laughs that he can squeak out of the comedic material he's offered for an easy (but fat) paycheck. There's always an appeal to a foul-mouthed, immature grandfatherly character, since many of us have or know at least one of them (my family specialized in drucles - drunk uncles - more, so I'm not keen on the movie). There's also the never-ending appeal of a sexy older woman with experience, hence me choosing to feature 10 hot celebrity grannies this week.

#10 - Blythe Danner

While Robert De Niro is moving on to a new movie where he's a funny grandpa, let us not forget that his previous partner in grandparenting crime, Blythe Danner (from the MEET THE PARENTS set of films) might just be the babe he didn't deserve. Danner plays such a wonderful straight woman that it's easy to overlook just how good she is at her craft. If only some of her laid-back genial nature had rubbed off more on Gwyneth.

#9 - Goldie Hawn

As a young woman, Goldie Hawn had such a wide-eyed unique beauty that it was impossible to ignore her. The ditzy girl act she put on was infectious fun. As a wealthy woman, she also set the precedent for getting a pre-nup if you don't want to fund the skeezy guy you fall in love with. I admire the f*ck out of Goldie even more than I'm impressed with her youthful vigor.

#8 - Suzanne Sommers

She's a bit batshit crazy with all of her natural therapies to cure cancer conspiracy theories but there's a good reason why Suzanne Sommers has been so successful peddling those diet books and exercise contraptions - woman looks outstanding! Our little Chrissy Snow-flake will be turning 70 later this year yet has looked the same indeterminable age for the past 30 years.

#7 - Tina Knowles

She's really only famous by association with her big booty-ed daughter (although she's managed to make a name for herself in the fashion industry as well) but damn if Tina Knowles isn't proof that Bey is going to grow old rather nicely. At 62, Tina can still work it like a girl group singer.

#6 - Rita Wilson

While the kids that Rita Wilson has had with Tom Hanks haven't bore any fruit from their loins, I'm still slipping her on the list because Tom's son Colin has and family is family even if it's step. Plus, Rita Wilson is one of the quiet, uncelebrated hotties out there and she needed a top ten list to be ranked on.

#5 - Neneh Cherry

She's mighty young to be a granny but Swedish born singer Nenah Cherry (she of the "Buffalo Stance") gave birth to her first child when she was only 19 years old, making her a MILF before the term had ever come to pass. While she's not as high profile as she (briefly) was during the late '80's, Cherry has continued to make music all these years and still looks as youthful as she did back in the day.

#4 - Jessica Lange

I love that "American Horror Story" was able to show a whole new generation just how badass Jessica Lange is. When I was a little girl, I watched two very different movies - KING KONG (my dad's fave with her in it) and TOOTSIE (my mom's fave) and was in awe of her strength and beauty. Little did I know my parents fought about my dad's love of the schlocky ape movie - I think she might have been jealous of his love of Jess.

#3 - Jaclyn Smith

The most enduring Angel of them all, Smith turned an impressive 70 last year and is still the babe I want to call to save me from the day. She's also one of the strongest voices in the fight against breast cancer, having survived her own bout with the disease in 2003.

#2 - Susan Lucci

I never watched daytime soap operas unless in a hostage situation (waiting room, nail salon, etc) so I didn't necessarily catch on to the long-lasting appeal that Susan Lucci has had with fans over the years. Now that she's in her 60's and still looks the same as she did 30 years ago, I get it. All of those dramatic tantrums are the elixir of life, apparently.

#1 - Susan Sarandon

I think we were all looking forward to Eva Amurri getting knocked up. Not only because it would mean a bump in her already impressive chest size but because who didn't want to think of pot-smoking, potty-mouthed Susan Sarandon as that hot grandma? Sarandon didn't need to have any kids or grandkids for me to think that she was a sexy beast but it sure does help when constructing a hot granny top ten.



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