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01.18.2017by: Cherry Liquor

The Top 10 Hottest Babes of Vin Diesel Movies

I love that Vin Diesel is a big fat dork. That he used to breakdance with his twin brother in the most sanitized instructional video ever made on the subject, that he's been known to boogie down at after parties like a gay Mormon kid who just broke away from the church, all of the stories and videos and words straight from his gravelly voice are awesome. But what I probably love more about Vin is that he has managed to surround himself with some of the most beautiful women in the business. So, in celebration of the sure to be horrendously goofy XXX: RETURN OF XANDER CAGE, let's celebrate those women who have bowed before the dorkness.

#10 - Jordana Brewster

I toyed with not even including Brewster on the list because the last 10 years she's managed to shrink and shrivel away into a nasty skeletor woman, not even a shadow of herself but a wisp of a fading scent of what she once was. Jordana was still rather fetching when the first Fast & Furious movie was made, saddled down with all of that baby fat she probably hated and spent years destroying. So I salute the high point in her hottie trajectory and think of what could have been if only.

#9 - Radha Mitchell

The first thing that I remember seeing Vin in was PITCH BLACK, a movie that terrified the shit out of me as I watched it with a group of friends in a pitch dark room while we were all good & baked. While the film ranks high in my favorite Diesel movies (KNOCKAROUND GUYS is up there too but there were no chicks to use from that), Mitchell and her odd, almost whiny delivery in the film nearly distracted from how beautiful she truly is.

#8 - Asia Argento

I happen to think that while the first XXX movie was rather schlocky, the one shining star was the vivaciously sexy Italian goddess, Asia Argento, who really gets far too little love for all that she's contributed to film. She got the help up from her dad but if I'm being totally honest with you, she is the only good thing he's ever really done. (Unless you like so-bad-it's-good and then the avenging monkey from PHENOMENON is kinda awesome too.)

#7 - Brittany Snow

Brittany seems to sneak into all of these terrible movies and doll them up, from the shamefully bad remake of PROM NIGHT to the so-bad-it's-kinda-good comedy JOHN TUCKER MUST DIE to the what-the-hell-was-Vin-thinking installment of his career with THE PACIFIER. I actually get why he made the movie, since Arnie was a Kindergarten Cop and all, but at least the movie had Brit (and a sexy Lauren Graham as well).

#6 - Zoe Saldana

I am Groot. I... Am... Groot... OK, it would get tiresome if the entire post for Zoe consisted of Vin's iconic line from GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY, but that's also half its charm as well. Even green, Saldana is a lean, mean, sexy machine and I couldn't blame the man for getting a little, um - wood? - for her.

#5 - Thandie Newton

While she's currently soaking up everyone's love for her gritty nude scenes in Westworld, out of everything that Newton has done that I both didn't expect and yet totally loved was her turn as the nasty royal climber in THE CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK. Sure, in that movie I also got to drool over Karl Urban as her beloved but Thandie was a scene stealer in all the right ways.

#4 - Gal Gadot

I'm sure Gal would rank at the top for a lot of other people but for me, she's higher up than others because I liked her character in the F&F movies enough that I could overlook the fact that her long-limbed skinniness is otherwise off-putting to me. Gal is of course beautiful as all get out and the fact that her character wasn't meant for Vin only made her that much more exotic when compiling this list.

#3 - Elsa Pataky

I would love to see Mrs Hemsworth flesh out her acting career just a little bit more, if only because listening to her floral Spanish accent in English is such a delight. She was tough, she was beautiful and she was tender for a slice of Dom in FAST FIVE, and even if they didn't last, it was that mutual back scratching that I think we all wish we could have traded places with Vin to get a piece of.

#2 - Michelle Rodriguez

There have been a lot of movie romances over the years that have kept people going, from Rick and Ilsa to Harry & Sally. But for our newer generations, it has been the long lasting love of Dom & Letty that persevered, even through that minor dabbling with Elsa, although I hardly doubt that Michelle minded sharing that particular piece of the covers. Michelle is one of those women who laughs in the face of the fashion magazine definition of beautiful and yet still looks perfectly at ease in their pages, marking her as easily one of the sexiest women alive.

#1 - Nina Dobrev

I haven't seen the movie yet and I honestly don't know if I ever will but dammit if I don't have a big ol' girl crush on Vin's most recent co-star, Nina Dobrev. In those goofy ass trailers for XXX: RETURN OF XANDER CAGE, Nina might have gotten my heart racing just a bit talking about a swing and a safe word and I really do think I could listen to her say "kumquat" over and over again, no problem at all. So in all of this hefty competition, she deserves the top.

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