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10.12.2011by: Randy the Ram

The Sexy Six: Hot Monster Chicks

Most of you have already started your October festivities with lots of horror movie watching, costume party planning and house decorating but now it's the Sexy Six's turn as we explore the fine line between creepy and sexy which is pretty much present all over Halloween and most horror flicks.

We basically went monster huntin' for some scary babes and found a nice batch of monstrously sexy chicks to share with you guys but beware, they bite!

The Frankenstein Monstresses

It’s a tie between the Bride of Frankenstein and Frankenstein Girl!

One is a classic icon of horror and spooky trends, you could even say she paved the way for cute monster girls, unfortunately her appearance is very short and a little TOO clothed so to even things out a little, on the other hand there’s Frankenstein Girl of VAMPIRE GIRL VS FRANKENSTEIN GIRL fame, one of those surreal psychotic kinetic splatterfest straight from (where else?) Japan. There’s a little bias due to my love of all things Asian but Eri Otoguro is just so yummy and while her character was way prettier while alive she brought her sexy A-game as the titular Frankenstein Girl.

5. The Giant Mutant

OK, let’s look at the facts. She’s a woman, wearing a skimpy 2 piece outfit, and she’s 50ft. tall. I don’t know about you but I find that rather sexy. Think about it, HUMONGOUS BOOBS!

Allison Hayes, played said 50 foot “monster” and has become a sort of staple for 50’s cheese and sci-fi monster movies and furthermore her character is part of one of the most iconic posters ever made.

You bet your pervy eyes that no one is really running away but probably taking a peek.

4. The Vampire

The first ever Sexy Six article featured vampires and guess who got the top spot? Well for continuity’s sake Selene, played by Kate Beckinsale, will remain as my main choice for sexiest vampire and here’s my mathematical logic as to why she deserves the spot:

(Kate Beckinsale+tight leather)*(badass+guns) /vampires = massive geek boner

3. The Zombie

I’m sorry all of you Linnea Quigley fans but for me the one zombie I’d give my heart and braaaaaains to is Julie Walker, played by the exotic Melinda Clarke. I’m definitely thankful for Quigley as she made the undead punk rock girl possible but Clarke took it to the next level in badass hotness.

2. The Werewolves


Seriously, if you haven't seen that movie you probably don't like Halloween nor horror and if it's any of those variables I don't know why are you even reading this.

Still with me? OK. This was a hard choice because I had to choose between Anna Paquin and her slutty costumed co-horts or Katherine Isabelle from GINGER SNAPS but it was more of them and did I mention slutty costumes? It's what Halloween is all about and that's precisely the main draw from TRICK R TREAT. It explores our fascination with the holiday in the most joyously macabre way and the scene where Paquin is ready to experience her first time, as a werewolf, is full of sexiness, of course until they start to rip off their own skin and eat the poor saps who fell for their charms.

1. The Demon

Critique JENNIFER’S BODY all you want, say what you will about Megan Fox but she looked damn hot in the film as a possessed cheerleader. Nakedness, bloodiness and a lesbian make-out scene make Jen’s body one to lust for. I do think the movie is crap but at least it comes with a yummy curvy filling and if a demon possessed girl was going to tear me to shreds while eating me might as well make it someone like Jennifer.



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