Is it weird I associate Jessica Biel's ass with mythical creatures like Sasquatch, the Loch Ness monster and a unicorn? We go so long in between sightings that I often question whether or not the times I have caught a good glimpse of it were real or not. Ms. Timberlake has always been one of my all-time favorites, and at the same time, an endless source of frustration. It's hard for me to reconcile my love and admiration for her with the nonsensical way in which she keeps that tightly formed ass out of the camera's eye. It's only when the stars are perfectly aligned do we get even peak at the greatest adult playground on Earth. I say this with the utmost seriousness: her booty is truly unique; one that is beyond compare; a four leaf clover; the Goldilocks of asses – not to big, not to small... Just right! Why then does she usually opt for garb of the Amish variety? Why not always accentuate and draw attention to it? And why not always make sure the photographer gets the shot? The way in which she conceals it is beyond counterintuitive. It's like those people that lock priceless works of art away in a safe; leaving it's life's work– reminding the human race that perfection is achievable – unfulfilled.
Click to ZOOM
