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Hottie Report Card: Rebecca Hall

04.18.2014by: Salacious Crumb

TRANSCENDENCE makes it's way to theaters this weekend, and it has Johnny Depp in it, so it will either make billions and become a smash success, or it'll make a few million less and be a huge failure. Still, I plan on seeing the thing, even if the trailer resembled an odd mixture of S1M0NE and LOOPER. Aside from Depp, it's got a pretty solid cast, including Paul Bettany, Morgan Freeman, Cillian Murphy and one of the most underrated movie hotties of our day, Rebecca Hall. Even though I could only dream of ever scoring a woman like Hall, let's have a look at this student's body and see how she ranks alongside other hotties. Why? Because pictures, that's why.

Rebecca has one of the most forgettable faces in the business these days. I'm not trying to bully her, but most of us had to watch several of her films before we realized we were looking at the same person. And it's not like she's a so-so actress (in fact, she's quite excellent), it's just that her look doesn't stand out much. However, this also means she's pretty enough to blend in with the likes of Scarlett Johansson and Penelope Cruz.

If there's one pet peeve I have as a professor, it's hotties who keep their butts locked up and hidden away. It's really a tragedy, especially when there's so much potential left untapped (pun intended). It got some much needed attention in LAY THE FAVORITE, but not much else since. What gives, Rebecca?The word "classical" comes to mind for some reason, although that could just be because the most I've seen of Hall's sugar dumplings were some scenes in WIDE SARGASSO SEA. They could also fill a martini glass (individually, of course), which brings the word "classy" to mind. They may not be followed around by a marching band and fireworks like Katy Perry's tots, but at least Rebecca knows damn well how to work with what she's got. She also gets extra credit for this excellent sideboob.

Hall seems like an appropriate hottie to bring back the "legs" category for. I know we've got some leg lovers out there, and if you're one of them, you're probably not reading any of this. You're too busy ogling, and that's fine. What Rebecca lacks in decent shots of her derriere she makes up for with lots of leg. Judging from the way she flaunts her stems in photoshoots, this is one feature she isn't shy about.

It's taken a while for Rebecca to become recognized as a celebrity by the mainstream, and we're not even entirely sure if she's there yet. However, she's gotten a lot of parts in movies with other high-profile actors and directors. She's never been the weakest link in any project I've ever seen her in, even if it's just a small role. Hopefully, that isn't about to change with TRANSCENDENCE, though I highly doubt it.

While I can't say I know a whole lot about her personally, I'm going to give Rebecca the benefit of doubt on this one. From the way other people talk about her, she's probably a charming specimen. Not to mention she works time and time again with the same people, who all have good things to say about her, so she must be doing something right. Last but not least, her fans are pretty persistent on trying to make her the next big thing. We wish her the best!

Extra Tidbit: How do you grade Rebecca Hall?


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