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Hottie Report Card: Emmy Rossum

08.26.2016by: Droz

Emmy Rossum is something of an oddity among the many famous hotties we know and love around here. She's graced with a natural beauty and is generally flawless in most respects, which makes hardly ever seeing her around in anything other than her Showtime show kinda strange. Don't get me wrong, she's a talented actress with a hit series coming up on its 7th season. Yet, for whatever reason, Emmy seems disinterested in parlaying her success into the sorts of things to which high profile people frequently aspire. It appears she's content to take success as it comes while avoiding becoming too big for her britches. Fair enough, but how good a hottie can Emmy be if she doesn't have her image plastered all over everything? We're gonna find out, right now.

The Emmy inconsistencies happen almost immediately with her looks. I mean is this a face deserving of all the big cosmetics company dollars or what? I think she's dabbled in that a little, but certainly not as much as others far less gifted here. Personally, I love how her Russian Jewish ancestry gives her an exotic flair, though not so much that she doesn't come across as sweet and pleasant. With Emmy I also refer to my usual barometer for judging natural beauty, namely observing them sans makeup (which she does a lot on her show). Emmy's no makeup moments do little to harm her beauty. And that's all I need to know.

So let's get the obvious knee jerk reaction out of the way first. No, Emmy's boobs are not the most massive, bounce around all over the place kinda tits you'll ever see. They don't frequently threaten to escape from everything she wears, nor are they the kind which make bikini-wearing a problem. Contrary to popular titties opinion, that's not a sin. But then we tend to be of the all shapes and sizes mentality around here. What Emmy has been graced with by nature is an elegant set which matches perfectly with her petite yet shapely frame. Plus, she shows them off a lot (NSFW), which almost always bumps up some boobies a few grade points.

Emmy's ass area tells a similar story to that of her boobies. No, hers is not the "so large it's fake-looking" style of ass you frequently see in the more reviled sectors of our reality TV subculture. I know many of you will be relieved to hear that. This said, Emmy is in no way possessing of a flat ass either. So what kind of booty is this, you may ask? The answer is, again, the perfect ass for her body. It's got just enough bounce to be dangerous, which makes it something of a Goldilocks ass. I have no trouble believing Emmy has the most delicious porridge.

The key word which comes to mind when thinking about Emmy's body is "elegant." She makes classical sculptures envious with her shapely hips, flat stomach, and long legs. Again I gotta come back to those perfect proportions of hers. It's all just right with her. Nothing too big, nothing too small. She's not too short or too tall. Her body makes of itself an idealized image. As good as all this is, Emmy becomes even better here by not viewing her great body as too good to be seen, thanks to her aforementioned fondness for showing off said perfection in its entirety (NSFW).

I wonder sometimes if Emmy's seeming reticence to do more movies comes from seeing many of them bomb pretty badly back in the early days of her career. It was something of a mixed bag for her there, with some hits and a few glaring misses. I'm sure it sucks to see your hard work tank horribly. So maybe scoring a hit with Shameless is all the success she needs. This is all speculation on my part, but I do know for a fact that Emmy has good things to offer as an actress. She's held her own and then some on her show with many of the finest actors of our time, in doing so joining them in excellence. Anyone who can do this is okay by me.

Emmy seems to me like a splendid mensch, using a word from her people's vocabulary. She always has a smile and a pleasant vibe coming off her whenever I see her anywhere. She's a big fan of animal rights and does a lot of supportive things for that cause, which is usually an indication of a quality human being. Normally I don't count a hottie's life companion as a positive, as they tend to interfere with my ability to delude myself into thinking I have a chance there. However, I have to give grudging respect to Emmy for her engagement to Sam Esmail, the inspired creator of Mr. Robot. Being a devoted fan of that show makes most anything he does seem pretty cool - even taking Emmy off the market. They do make a pretty good couple, so I can live with it.

Check out our previous Hottie Report Cards...

"A" Students: Salma Hayek, Jennifer Aniston, Paula Patton, Gemma Arterton, Amber Heard, Lacey Chabert, Jaimie Alexander, Gillian Jacobs, Natalie Dormer, Amy Adams, Alison Brie, Alexandra Daddario, Kelly Brook, Kate Mara, Eva Green, Carla Gugino, Scarlett Johansson, Kate Upton, Sofia Vergara, Jennifer Lawrence, Charlize Theron, Olivia Munn, Zoe Saldana, Rosario Dawson, Olga Kurylenko, Olivia Wilde, Kaley Cuoco, Hayley Atwell, Lauren Cohan, Anne Hathaway, Jessica Chastain, Victoria Justice, Maria Menounos, Mila Kunis, Rosamund Pike, Margot Robbie, Nina Agdal, Shailene Woodley, Amanda Seyfried, Christina Hendricks, Jessica Alba, Ashley Greene, Charlotte McKinney, Kate Beckinsale, Aly Michalka, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Morena Baccarin, Katy Perry, Emmanuelle Chriqui, Hilary Duff, Sara Jean Underwood.

"B" Students: Sandra Bullock, Alice Eve, Jenna Fischer, Lena Headey, Kristen Bell, Anna Kendrick, Cobie Smulders, Rashida Jones, Danielle Harris, Nicole Beharie, Ellie Kemper, Michelle Trachtenberg, Evangeline Lilly, Meagan Good, Gabrielle Union, Yvonne Strahovski, Sarah Hyland, Emily Browning, Imogen Poots, Tina Fey, Karen Gillan, Rebecca Hall, Elizabeth Banks, Annet Mahendru, Emily Blunt, Emilia Clarke, Moon Bloodgood, Danielle Fishel, Keri Russell, Cameron Diaz, Rachel McAdams, Megan Fox, Aubrey Plaza, Emily Ratajkowski, Michelle Monaghan, Adrianne Palicki, Nicole Kidman, Kat Dennings, Keira Knightley, Allison Williams, Jena Malone, Rose Byrne, Maggie Grace, Jennifer Lopez, Sienna Miller, Jordana Brewster, Felicity Jones, Blake Liveley, Elizabeth Olsen, Reese Witherspoon, Brittany Snow, Jennette McCurdy, Ronda Rousey, Bryce Dallas Howard, Alyssa Milano, Rhona Mitra, Natalie Martinez, Ashley Benson, Elizabeth Gillies, Odette Yustman, Kristen Stewart, Alicia Vikander, Kate Bosworth, Juno Temple, Zooey Deschanel, Kirsten Dunst, Bella Thorne, Deborah Ann Woll, Daisy Ridley, Sophie Turner, Emily VanCamp, Selena Gomez, Sarah Silverman, Hailee Steinfeld, Katharine McPhee.

"C" Students: Kristen Wiig, Katherine Heigl, Dakota Johnson.

"D" Students: Khloe Kardashian.

Source: Movie Hotties


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