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Hottie Report Card: Bella Thorne

02.26.2016by: Droz

2015/2016 seem to be especially flush with famous hotties turning 18. Makes me wonder what was going on back in 1997/1998 to deliver such a concentrated collection of fine, famous hotties to maturity at once. The barely legal hottie we have in mind this week is Bella Thorne. If you're familiar with Bella at all, you'll know she she wasn't the sort to wait for her legal status to arrive before she began showing off sexy. At 18, she's already a veteran in getting people off. Those are kinda creepy, but paradoxically effective efforts. But there's no reason to dwell on the past. This Report Card is all about the present and future. How do you grade Bella?

Not to much happening on Bella that isn't top notch. This comes with the territory when dealing with 18-year-old models. Even so, she is quite a lovely young woman, even where models go. From the hair to the eyes to her full lips, she's got a face made for looking at and getting all tingly. She clearly chose the right profession.

Bella's aren't the biggest boobs ever, but they'll do. Even if they're not bulging out everywhere, Bella compensates by showing them off whenever she gets the chance, which is to say practically every day if you happen to follow her on Snapcat. Sounds okay to me. Better than gigantic boobs always covered up. I'm looking at you, Ms. Hendricks.

Bella's ass is what one might describe as the perfect white girl ass. It might not bounce around like a dodge ball, but at least it's not the flat and featureless kind resembling a deflated balloon. It's right there in a nice little middle ground where asses go. Nobody without some sort of fetish is gonna have a problem with an ass like Bella's.

We again come back to the whole rock hard 18-year-old thing when assessing Bella's fitness. This is her time to shine where bodies go. Not an inch out of place on her. Not an ounce of fat where it's not supposed to be. Her Snapchat pics provide an excellent explanation for how this tight bod is accomplished. The gist of this involves her being a frequent sight at her local gym, working out in the most provocative ways possible. All her effort there is paying off.

I'm not sure if what Bella does can be called a career. While she has begun to get legitimate modelling and acting work, much of her fame continues to come from taking slutty pics and videos with her phone and posting them on various social media sites. While this might be the more democratic approach to entering the modelling or acting biz, it's certainly not the same as the usual "pay your dues" path most of the big league models went by. One day having a large social media following may be the way models make it in that field. For now, it seems pretty artificial. Even by modelling standards.

You can get the gist of Bella's personality development by simply spending a little time on her social media pages. Which doesn't come as a shock. You can't be her age, live her kind of life, and still possess a complex, multifaceted personality. Her lot are content to be superficial show offs, going around partying with their friends and posting it all online in various bids to make themselves look good. Anyway, it's understandable if she's shallow at this point in her life. Let's just hope, for her sake, she doesn't stay that way.

Check out our previous Hottie Report Cards...

"A" Students: Salma Hayek, Jennifer Aniston, Paula Patton, Gemma Arterton, Amber Heard, Lacey Chabert, Jaimie Alexander, Gillian Jacobs, Natalie Dormer, Amy Adams, Alison Brie, Alexandra Daddario, Kelly Brook, Kate Mara, Eva Green, Carla Gugino, Scarlett Johansson, Kate Upton, Sofia Vergara, Jennifer Lawrence, Charlize Theron, Olivia Munn, Zoe Saldana, Rosario Dawson, Olga Kurylenko, Olivia Wilde, Kaley Cuoco, Hayley Atwell, Lauren Cohan, Anne Hathaway, Jessica Chastain, Victoria Justice, Maria Menounos, Mila Kunis, Rosamund Pike, Margot Robbie, Nina Agdal, Shailene Woodley, Amanda Seyfried, Christina Hendricks, Jessica Alba, Ashley Greene, Charlotte McKinney, Kate Beckinsale, Aly Michalka, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Morena Baccarin.

"B" Students: Sandra Bullock, Alice Eve, Jenna Fischer, Lena Headey, Kristen Bell, Anna Kendrick, Cobie Smulders, Rashida Jones, Danielle Harris, Nicole Beharie, Ellie Kemper, Michelle Trachtenberg, Evangeline Lilly, Meagan Good, Gabrielle Union, Yvonne Strahovski, Sarah Hyland, Emily Browning, Imogen Poots, Tina Fey, Karen Gillan, Rebecca Hall, Elizabeth Banks, Annet Mahendru, Emily Blunt, Emilia Clarke, Moon Bloodgood, Danielle Fishel, Keri Russell, Cameron Diaz, Rachel McAdams, Megan Fox, Aubrey Plaza, Emily Ratajkowski, Michelle Monaghan, Adrianne Palicki, Nicole Kidman, Kat Dennings, Keira Knightley, Allison Williams, Jena Malone, Rose Byrne, Maggie Grace, Jennifer Lopez, Sienna Miller, Jordana Brewster, Felicity Jones, Blake Liveley, Elizabeth Olsen, Reese Witherspoon, Brittany Snow, Jennette McCurdy, Ronda Rousey, Bryce Dallas Howard, Alyssa Milano, Rhona Mitra, Natalie Martinez, Ashley Benson, Elizabeth Gillies, Odette Yustman, Kristen Stewart, Alicia Vikander, Kate Bosworth, Juno Temple, Zooey Deschanel, Kirsten Dunst.

"C" Students: Kristen Wiig, Katherine Heigl, Dakota Johnson.

"D" Students: Khloe Kardashian.

Source: Movie Hotties


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