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Hottie Report Card: Amanda Seyfried

03.27.2015by: Salacious Crumb

Boy, I tell ya' what. I was expecting there to be some backlash in regards to my "generous" grading of Shailene Woodley last week, but never would I ever have expected such a cumulative uproar from those whose opinions differed. For whatever reason, I imagine this week's hottie student will go over better with the majority of you schmoes, but then again, what do I know? This week, she can be seen in select theaters in the well-reviewed dramedy WHILE WE'RE YOUNG, alongside Ben Stiller and Naomi Watts. Of course, if you haven't figured it out by now, the student I'm referring to is Amanda Seyfried. This should come as no surprise, as Seyfried's been known in the hottie universe for over a decade now, so it's about time she was "put to the test." So without further adieu, let's put on our ogling caps and get down to grading this hottie (in a respective manner, of course)!

While I'm sure I'm not the only admirer of above-the-shoulders Seyfried out there, I imagine there would be some schmoes who disagree. Whatever the cause of such a travesty may be, I will proudly stand my fandom of this hottie's face. Amanda's been a beaut since MEAN GIRLS, but she's gone from representing a girl to a woman in the past decade, and her hotness has only grown better with each following year. And while I know they're often joked about, particularly in A MILLION WAYS TO DIE IN THE WEST, I actually adore Amanda's big fishbowl eyes.

Amanda doesn't typically "show off" her derriere as often as some other hotties we know, and yes, that's a major bummer. That said, it's hard to stay mad at the girl when she provides us with so many great photoshoots, not to mention her outstanding collection of hottie clips. If you're looking to rent a movie, and you're a fan of celebrity fannies, your best bet with Amanda would probably be BOOGIE WOOGIE. Although Seyfried hasn't showcased her behind in any of her various photoshoots, it's had some rather substantial moments on candid camera. I wouldn't want to embarass Amanda by sharing any of those photos, butt here you go...

Anyone who's been a fan of this hottie's should likely has a soft spot for these two particular soft spots. They may not actually be able to predict the weather (yet, anyway), but Amanda's boobs carry some impressive qualities nonetheless. The only downside to our previous subject is that we didn't have much to go by, but Amanda has done plenty of "show and tell" in this department. If you're still without a clue, check out LOVELACE and I'll take an Edible Arrangement as a "thank you".

As you're well aware of by now, we generally wouldn't feature an actress in this column unless they exceeded in this department, particularly. However, just to further prove my point in the case of Ms. Seyfried, I've decided to pair up a 10-year-old photo with a relatively new one. Not everyone will agree, as this stuff usually comes down to varying tastes, but I absolutely crave ladies with Seyfried's body type.

I wouldn't say that Amanda has broken major ground in the film industry, but facts would suggest she's come awfully close to becoming the next "ScarJo" or "J-Law" (she just hasn't hired someone to hyphen her name yet). That said, she actually has quite an impressive list of successful films with her name stamped on 'em somewhere, including LES MISERABLES, IN TIME, MAMMA MIA!, DEAR JOHN, LETTERS TO JULIET, EPIC and RED RIDING HOOD. Hell, if you're interested in checking out a movie filled with hotties, you could do a lot worse than BOOGIE WOOGIE or JENNIFER'S BODY. That said, with her next major project being TED 2, let's just hope the unbreakable Seth MacFarlane doesn't get in the way of her future potential.There will always be hotties who say one thing in an interview, only to utterly contradict that statement in the near future. On the flip side, Amanda has been candid about her faults, and is a firm believer of change and learning through mistakes. These, of course, are the same beliefs of her MEAN GIRLS co-star Lindsay Lohan, but Amanda has come to this conclusion before nearly putting people's lives in danger. But who knows? I may be eating my words in a year when video footage is released of Amanda spouting anti-semitic rants at a highway patrolman. Even if such a situation were to occur, I'm sure Amanda's giant fishbowl eyes would get her out of a ticket.

Check out our previous Hottie Report Cards...

"A" Students: Salma Hayek, Jennifer Aniston, Paula Patton, Gemma Arterton, Amber Heard, Lacey Chabert, Jaimie Alexander, Gillian Jacobs, Natalie Dormer, Amy Adams, Alison Brie, Alexandra Daddario, Kelly Brook, Kate Mara, Eva Green, Carla Gugino, Scarlett Johansson, Kate Upton, Sofia Vergara, Jennifer Lawrence, Charlize Theron, Olivia MunnZoe Saldana, Rosario DawsonOlga Kurylenko, Olivia Wilde, Kaley Cuoco, Hayley Atwell, Lauren Cohan, Anne Hathaway, Jessica Chastain, Victoria Justice, Maria Menounos, Mila Kunis, Rosamund Pike, Margot Robbie, Nina Agdal, Shailene Woodley.

"B" Students: Sandra Bullock, Alice Eve, Jenna Fischer, Lena Headey, Kristen Bell, Anna Kendrick, Cobie Smulders, Rashida Jones, Danielle Harris, Nicole Beharie, Ellie Kemper, Michelle Trachtenberg, Evangeline Lilly, Meagan Good, Gabrielle Union, Yvonne Strahovski, Sarah Hyland, Emily Browning, Imogen Poots, Tina Fey, Karen Gillan, Rebecca Hall, Elizabeth Banks, Annet Mahendru, Emily Blunt, Emilia Clarke, Moon Bloodgood, Danielle Fishel, Keri Russell, Cameron Diaz, Rachel McAdams, Megan Fox, Aubrey Plaza, Emily Ratajkowski, Michelle Monaghan, Adrianne Palicki, Nicole Kidman, Kat Dennings, Keira Knightley, Allison Williams, Jena Malone, Rose Byrne, Maggie Grace, Jennifer Lopez, Sienna Miller.

"C" Students: Kristen Wiig, Katherine Heigl, Dakota Johnson.

"D" Students: Khloe Kardashian.

Extra Tidbit: What do YOU grade Amanda Seyfried, professor?


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