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Face Off: Jennifer Lawrence vs. Alison Brie

03.23.2015by: Droz

So Kelly Brook beat Elisha Cuthbert in last week's Face Off, though not without some protest. All you people and your Kelly hatin'. It's almost as though you have an aversion to seeing ginormous tits and beautiful female faces graced with sweet smiles all the time. I don't know. Makes me wonder sometimes about which side of the bread you haters butter.

This week sees both Jennifer Lawrence and Alison Brie with new movies out. Jen has her depression era melodrama SERENA and Alison her goofball comedy GET HARD. There's two movies that couldn't have less to do with one another if they tried. Jennifer and Alison are also pretty different, but kind of alike as well. One of them does mostly comedies and TV, the other blockbusters and Oscar bait. One is blonde, the other brunette, and so on. Then again, they're both charming and cute and clever. They both have a ton of fans. And perhaps most importantly, they're both hot as hell. Sounds like grounds enough for a Face Off. Now you just gotta decide which of these dissimilar and similar hotties is your favorite.

Beauty

I've had some mixed feelings about Jennifer's looks over the years. When she first started out she was the pretty blonde teen. Then she seemed to go through an awkward phase where she fluctuated a bit with her weight and occasionally looked a little...off. But she's long since emerged from that, establishing herself as the beautiful young thing she is. My enchantment with Alison is just a little stronger, but I think we can all agree that Jen is plenty easy on the eyes.

I look at Alison and I feel good. I don't know how else to put it. She's got some serious sweetness locked up in that smile and those big, blue eyes. I can't help but become smitten whenever I see her. Occasionally she'll switch things up and put on a seductive face, like the one up top there, just to take us from merely smitten to desperately horny for her. There's never been a time when I wasn't overjoyed to see Alison and, short of any disfiguring accidents, I doubt there ever will be.

Body

You and I both know there are way better pictures of Jennifer's body out there. But since we're not interested in getting sued, let's just set those aside for now. Doesn't matter anyway, because if you've seen anything of Jen in the last few years you already know she has an amazing body. I don't think there's anything more to say on that.

How many countless moments of happiness have Alison and her awesome rack given us Community fans? So many I can't remember them all. How about her hot magazine spreads? There's been a bunch of those too. Great stuff like this and more is all the evidence one needs to prove that Alison has a great body.

Hotness

So Jennifer looks hot. No doubt about that. What I find the hottest about her is how sharp she is. Girl has a knack for saying the most clever shit, her comebacks are the stuff of legend and her ability to charm your pants off is unrivaled by anyone in her generation. An example of this is her Oscar interview from a couple years ago. Watch her handle Jack Nicholson and tell me that isn't someone you want to get to know a whole lot better. There are so many good reasons to be hot for Jen, but moments like those are my favorite.

I'd be lying if I said Alison's boobs weren't a big part of what makes her hot. We all love her tits. There's more to her hotness than just a great rack though. I like how easily she switches from cute and sweet to sexy slutty. That might be just an act she puts on, but I like to think such moments are also a viable part of her personality. Alison fans have heard the stories of her penchant for wildness. I'd so love to know the full story there - her behind closed doors moments, if you will. I'll bet they're fantastic.

Career

Jennifer has reached a point in her career where she can write her own ticket. I'm sure she's inundated with great scripts and actively sought after by the best directors and most talented actors. No doubt the roles she turns down are the stuff other actors would kill for. That makes it a little confusing to see her in this SERENA movie, which looks subpar at best. Her so-called "no sex" movie hubby Bradley Cooper is in it, which probably says a lot there. Then again, who's going to turn down a chance to have Jennifer Lawrence in their movie? Nobody, that's who.

Jennifer is on a hot streak, there's no doubt about that. Kind of hard to compare anyone else's career to one who's riding as high as she is now. That's why I wont even try. Alison has her own accomplishments to be proud of and it looks like things are starting to pick up for her where career is concerned. So really it's just a matter of degrees of success with these two. Alison may not be as big a name as Jennifer is, but she's doing just fine.

IT'S A TIE!

Been awhile since my vote was tied, but I'm equally fascinated with both these ladies. I adore all the great things they do and everything they are. I think it would be blissful to know either one.

Just one man's opinion. What are your thoughts?
EXPRESS THEM BELOW!!

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