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Face Off: Emma Stone vs. Evangeline Lilly

07.13.2015by: Droz

So much butthurt in last week's Face Off over Sandra Bullock's career. I find it mildly disturbing that you folks are so focused on money. Yes, Sandra's stuff has earned a lot more money than Gillian Anderson's. So what? Money doesn't automatically equal quality. A lot of that money Sandra's made comes from romcoms and other stuff I hated. On the other hand, many of Gillian's movies and shows are fantastic and I enjoy them thoroughly. So f*ck the money and the awards. My career vote goes to the one who entertains me more. Not just the one who makes the money.

But anyway, this week sees Emma Stone and Evangeline Lilly in movies that couldn't be more different. Evangeline has got the next big Marvel adaptation ANT MAN exploding onto screens across the planet. Meanwhile, Emma will be heading up Woody Allen's IRRATIONAL MAN opening in limited release. Talk about disparate box office numbers. These are two different men for two different women, but which one is different enough to be your favorite?

Beauty

I've heard Emma is not some people's cup of tea here. I'm not sure I understand why, but I've always been fascinated with her. Those goofy little smiles, her cute awkwardness, or alternatively that offbeat vibe she's so good at radiating - I find all that beautiful to behold. Not to mention her actual, physical good looks, highlighted by an almost constant fidelity to the redhead lifestyle. I can't second place anyone who has all that going for her.

Speaking of hot redheads, how beautiful was Evangeline as Tauriel in THE HOBBIT? With those little ears? Forget about it. Certainly one of the better moments for me and my appreciation of Eva's looks. She's always pretty, but there's been some kind of weird conspiracy in a lot of her movies and shows to push a tomboy look with the minimal makeup. Maybe Eva prefers it that way. Maybe you do too. Me, I like her a lot more when she's spruced up a bit.

Body

A year ago I might have gone in the opposite way with this one. That was back when Emma was doing the way too skinny thing, probably as per somebody's shitty advice about how to make herself more marketable. Lately Emma has eased off on that somewhat, which has allowed all sorts of wonderful curves to bud over the breadth of her body. It's a look that suits her.

The word that comes to mind when I look at Evangeline's body is "athletic." Not that there's anything wrong with that. She's one tight little thing. On a personal preference level, I'm more about the softer, rounder types. That said, a 35-year-old mom who can still manage a tight ass like hers is a most impressive sight.

Hotness

Emma's unconventional beauty and thickening body are good enough for me here, but what really gives her the edge is attitude. We see so many loathsome people in this business - fame addicts, attention junkies, and the selfish, self-destructive idiots caught up in their own hype machines. Emma is nothing like that. She's an authentic person of a highly magnetic quality. Mix all that with the physical beauty and you got something real special.

This was a close one. I almost made it a tie. If I'm gonna be honest though, I have to admit that Emma's approach to hotness is way more like what I have in my mind than most women, Evangeline included. That's not to say that Eva isn't hot. Of course she's hot. I just like Emma more here. Nothing more to it than that.

Career

All that cool stuff about Emma I discuss above is frequently incorporated into the performances she gives. That's why so many of her characters have such a charm and wit about them. Even if the movie isn't all that good, Emma's part to play in it will be good just because she approaches her roles that way. I've found something to like in many a movie I might have otherwise hated, just because Emma was in them.

It seemed likely that Evangeline was gone from acting for good, until Peter Jackson brought her back into the Hollywood fold with THE HOBBIT movies. She's since set herself up with yet another potential blockbuster franchise in ANT MAN. That's all great and I'm sure Evangeline will be great in this. However, if you told me Emma was the one playing Hope van Dyne, I'd be even more excited. Sort of like what she did for THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN. That's just what Emma does to me.

Emma

A rare clean sweep, which should make all you tie game haters happy. Emma is more than just an object of desire for me. I'd very much like to get to know her on a deeply personal and emotional level. Which is another way to say that I'm a notch below stalker where she's concerned. I really should take my pills now.

Just one man's opinion. What are your thoughts?

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