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Face Off: Christina Hendricks vs. Ariel Winter

06.20.2016by: Droz

Last week's Face Off proved once again just how resilient Alison Brie's reputation for hotness is, despite her persistent and frequently frustrating teasing. If an unabashed sex scene junkie like Emmy Rossum can't dethrone Alison, I wonder if anyone can.

You may be wondering right now why I have two hotties 23 years apart in a Face Off. It's not such a mystery if you think about it. Christina Hendricks' hottie modus operandi, which consists of ample curves and tits, tits, and even more tits, has served her well over the last 15 years or so. But now there's new blood coming up in the hottie ranks, using essentially the same play book as Christina. Many of us have come to admire Ariel Winter's game in recent months. Girl pops out in all the right places. And while she might be relatively new at this getting you off game, she's proved herself a quick learner. This leaves us with a dilemma, namely who's got the more entertaining curvaceous boob show? The seasoned veteran? Or the plucky upstart? Let the generational hottie war begin.


Ariel might be sporting the fake red hair right now, but we all know who does fake red hair best. For years Christina has replaced her natural blonde locks with red, to the delight of yours truly and many others. Unfortunately her other attributes tend to dominate the collective attention of both fans and haters alike, which is understandable. However, my first fascination with Christina was this lovely red hair and her sweet, innocent face on Firefly. Turns out her Saffron character wasn't so innocent, but she was and is still adorable. The years haven't hurt her there yet.

Having just crossed the line between felony and barely legal, it's understandable Ariel should still sport something of a baby face. Being of the curvier variety of hotties doesn't exactly help her there either. Persistent baby fat seems to be a problem for this new crop of 18 to 25 year-olds. They just don't want to give it up, which results in a lot of uncomfortably prepubescent-looking hotties. It's unclear whether Ariel will buck the trend and grow out of her youthful look. It's simply too early to tell.


We've been waiting since Christina's 20s to see what she's got going on under them clothes. There have been a few close calls there, but as yet no naked Christina. Unfortunately the limited window for such things is probably starting to close now that she's in her 40s. But, regardless of any lack of full on Hendricks titty action, all these years of insane cleavage and extreme curvaceousness have been a privilege. Such things might not be everyone's cup of tea, but they taste just fine to this guy.

One could argue Ariel is getting a head start on her curvy body game compared to Christina, who at Ariel's age was still a relatively fit aspiring actress and model. The similarities between these two might have even been closer now, had Ariel not decided to get that boob reduction. As great as untouched Ariel boobs would be, I can't blame her for wanting avoid any future back problems. Anyway, the rest of her compensates for any missing pieces up top.


Debate about Christina's body must invariably flow into talk of her hotness. Some folks find her totally unacceptable as a hottie. Some like her, but find her fondness for titty shows too over-the-top. Me, I cherish every absurdly gratuitous dress, every flirty temptress role, every sex charged spread she's ever posed for over the years. It all comes together to produce one of the great wall-breaking hotties of our time.

5 months of being a legal show off isn't sufficient to catch Ariel up with Christina's decades of hotness. However, it would be silly to make a claim against her here. Girl is clearly off to a good start where being a hottie goes. What remains uncertain is how long she'll be able to keep it up. For many actresses and whatnot who go the sex kitten route, there comes a point when it starts to lose its charm. Could be this is Ariel's fate. Again, only time will tell.


Christina has struggled to break into a successful movie career in recent years, but television has been always been very kind to her. We all know about her in Mad Men and my fellow geeks know about Firefly. I've enjoyed her briefly on the recent Hap and Leonard, as well as the crazy irreverent Another Period. The funny thing about all these various roles is how Chrstina pretty much always plays the same person. Not much of a character actor is she. Fortunately for her, it's a likable character, so it's all good.

Despite being so young, Ariel already has an impressive array of work to her name. Granted, most of this work to date consists of one time kid roles, but it's all good experience. She's even managed to win a few awards as part of the ensemble cast on Modern Family. Ariel's rise to mainstream stardom has happened quicker than Christina's, but for overall superior bodies of work, it's still Christina on top right now. Mmmmm, Christina on top...


Despite the obvious age difference between these two, their approach to being the hotties they are comes with a number similarities. Not to mention the obvious physical comparisons one might make. For me, it's all about the history and the investment we've put into desiring Christina. However, I have faith Ariel will be no less endearing to a whole new generation of curvy hottie lovers in years to come.

Just one man's opinion. What are your thoughts?


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