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Face Off: Charlotte McKinney vs. Sara Jean Underwood

06.27.2016by: Droz

Seemed like the majority of you weren't ready to replace Christina Hendricks with Ariel Winter as the new name in curvaceous hotness. I understand. Christina has built up quite the devoted fan base over the years, myself among them. Ariel has a lot of work to do before she catches up with Christina's legacy as a big titty show off.

Speaking of show offs. It's a given both Charlotte McKinney and Sara Jean Underwood derive much of their fame from a mutual willingness to show off copious amounts of their bangable bodies. It was for this purpose, one might argue, these two were born in the first place. I can't imagine Charlotte or Sara spending their days behind a desk, or performing brain surgery, or chopping down trees. Nah, they get mostly naked on Instagram and magazines. This is why they're here. But which one is the best at their mutual birthright?

Beauty

I wont lie and say either of these two have my favorite faces. To be brutally honest, I didn't even realize they had faces until like a year ago. I've been frequently distracted by the rest of them pretty much the whole time they've been around. I suspect most people familiar with Charlotte and Sara could say the same thing. This said, I don't disapprove of either one here. Their neck up area are perfectly fine accompaniments to rest of them.

←That.

Body

The whole of Charlotte's body is a good thing. However, the real power of her bod lies in them titties. As legendary as any massive boobs which came before or will come after, her thumb sprainers have become legendary for straining many a bra and bikini top to the very limits of their capacities. This has allowed her, in a relatively short time, to redefine the whole idea of barely contained. It's amazing she doesn't pop out of everything the puts on.

While Charlotte makes the case for glorious boobs, Sara does the same for perfect asses. This wasn't always the case. Back in her Playboy days, Sara was relatively normal where T&A goes - maybe even a little too petite. The last few years have seen a dramatic change with Sara there. While implants have increased her boobs to a more filled out size, the impressive rounding out of her ass is the real miracle. It's a testament to what can be accomplished with the right kind of workout.

Hotness

There→

Some of you could conceivably pick out one of these two as the hotter of the pair. I won't say it's impossible. I'm just not inclined to it myself. I might say Charlotte's boobs are amazing, but this would be shortchanging Sara's ass. Charlotte looks amazing in a bikini, but Sara looks just as great in nothing at all - maybe better. They've each got their stand out elements here, which in my mind raise them up to a fairly even height as hotties. So no call here either.

Career

Charlotte's rise to prominence is actually kind of impressive, relatively speaking. Granted, it's not like she did anything particularly amazing or socially redeeming. She shows off her boobs. However, going from an unknown burger babe to cover girl in major publications and representative of high profile fashion companies in just a couple years, is still pretty impressive. Thus the power of a really incredible set of tits. Like the balloons they resemble, such tits have the power to carry one to the highest of heights.

I'm not sure what having tons of social media followers pays. I suspect it's not bad money, particularly if you can get a company to subsidize your efforts there. It's likely Sara's efforts pay better than her time as a Playboy bunny did. It still doesn't resonate as anything more than what it is, namely sitting around with a phone and snapping sexy pics of yourself. No big surprise such things should get monetized, but that doesn't necessarily make it a career. Not in my estimation anyway.

Charlotte

I wouldn't call my pick here a referendum on these two. Much like the referendum they just had in the UK, I'm sure this one will be subject to much after the fact changes of heart. Like when SJU puts some new pics on Instagram, which should happen any time now. For now, I'm just going to post my favorite pic of Charlotte and call this a Face Off.

Just one man's opinion. What are your thoughts?

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