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Face Off: Aubrey Plaza vs. Rashida Jones

07.29.2013by: Droz

It looked like all my comic fans were still recovering from SDCC during last week's Face Off. Either that or the geek contingent couldn't bear to choose between the two X-men film iterations. Those who did vote seemed to be more for the OT crew. Fine choice. I wonder which group will take the hotness lead in DAYS OF FUTURE PAST. Based on how X-MEN 3 ended, I'm going to say First Class has the majority hottie stake now, but I could be wrong there.

Like me, you might have been impressed with Aubrey Plaza's recent GQ spread. We don't often see the sexier side of Aubrey displayed in such a manner. That made her an obvious choice for one half of this week's Face Off. The dilemma was who to put up against her. I had to think about that for a bit. After all, there aren't many ladies like Aubrey around. Then it hit me - why not choose her Parks & Recreation co-star, Rashida Jones? Two much loved funny women from the same show, it makes perfect sense to compare them. So which Parks & Rec hottie would you like to recreate with?

Beauty

I don't have a problem with Aubrey's looks. She's got that thing where her face changes, like in the above photo where she takes on a young Joan Jett look, very different from the Olivia Munn resemblance she's usually got going on. The problem is that most of the time when I see her in something, she's got that bitchy scowl on her face. I'm okay with her being a smart ass, but it wouldn't kill them to let her smile from time to time. She has the ability to come across as really sweet. They should let her show that side of herself more.

There has never been a time when I didn't look at Rashida with hearts in my eyes. Hell, I remember her from way back in the early 90s when she showed up for a second as herself in that documentary LISTEN UP: THE LIVES OF QUINCY JONES, documenting the life and career of her father. She was only 12 or 13-years-old, awkward and with mouth full of braces, but still adorable. I've never stopped crushing on Rashida since then. With such a sweet face, I don't think it's possible to not be happy with the look of her.

Body

Aubrey might not have the biggest pair of tits or whatever, but that's not something I choose to fault about her. She's got a great figure and she looks just as she should as far as I'm concerned. No reason to mess up a good thing. I praise ladies like Aubrey who keep it natural and resist the pressure to go for fake-looking enhancements. She doesn't need it anyway.

Same deal with Rashida. She has a beautiful figure, nothing crazy or out of proportion. Nothing anyone couldn't be completely content with. She might have a little more up top than Aubrey, but that's only one part of a larger package. Taken as whole, I'd be equally content with either of these ladies' bodies.

Hotness

I'm sure at least some of Aubrey's smart ass attitude is part of an act she does for her show and her comedy routine. Though it wouldn't surprise me if some of it was authentic Aubrey as well. Being the f*cked up glutton for punishment that I am, a woman with such a blasť personality is just the kind of person I go for. Perhaps it's the challenge inherent in pleasing such a woman. Perhaps disappointment is just my thing. Whatever the case, if I was working in the same office as Aubrey, she'd be the one I'd gravitate toward the fastest.

Maybe I'm weird, but I tend to have a kid sister feeling about Rashida. I'm a heterosexual male, so I recognize her beauty and hotness. She nonetheless feels like someone I might have more of a connection with as a cool friend. She'd be like that girl I know and love who I sometimes wonder about sexually, but never get with. It would be a situation very much like those you've seen in nearly every quirky romcom ever made, only without the sappy ending.

Career

So I enjoy Aubrey's smart ass approach. We're kindred in that respect and I find her entertaining to watch when she's acting like that. I'm not so sure it really makes her characters all that likable though. You spend most of your time waiting for her to show up and be bitchy smart ass. Don't get me wrong, I really do like that, but I'm also aware that some people don't. In this case, I'll opt for the sweeter of the two. Were I in a shittier mood today, it could have easily gone the other way here.

I enjoy Rashida because she makes anything palatable to me. One thing I can't stand are romcoms, but I've actually enjoyed those Rashida has done, mostly because she's in them. She's funny and sweet enough to get me to like her in a role, but then she can keep me interested by not letting things delve too far into sappiness when the drama ramps up. Getting me to sit through such movies is a feat in itself, much less enjoying them. So she gets my vote here for that.

Rashida

I don't like that I've picked one over the other here, but I tied it up last time so a decision has to be made this time. I love Rashida a lot and I suspect she's a fantastic person to have in one's life when you're ready to go have some fun. Aubrey would be my go to person on a shitty day when I want to make myself feel better at the expense of others. These are two vital sorts of people to have around. They're also easy on eyes, which is important as well. I give Rashida an edge here for whatever reason, but they're both ladies I love to watch.

Just one man's opinion. What are your thoughts?
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