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Face Off: AnnaSophia Robb vs. Maria Menounos

11.04.2013by: Droz

Folks seemed to think that Ripley was the hotter sci-fi badass in last week's Face Off. That makes sense. To be honest, Sarah Connor was kind of a bitch. Sure, Ripley was too, but in a good way.

It might seem strange that we're comparing AnnaSophia Robb to Maria Menounos this week. After all, they don't have very much in common. Maria's got about 15 years on AnnaSophia, who in turn is very much your nordic-looking European compared to Maria's Mediterranean looks. One is an actress on TV and movies, the other hosts a celebrity gossip show and occasionally wrestles on the side. They do have a couple things in common though - they both wear tight dresses on their shows and they both have big, beautiful butts. And just like that they are instantly equalized. But who's beautiful ass looks better in a tight dress? "Ass"ign a winner below.

Beauty

Despite the fact that these two have different things happening in this category, I like them both enough to tie it up here. AnnaSophia is very much the blonde surfer chick type, which made her perfect for the one-armed surfer girl biopic, That look usually doesn't do as much for me, but she's saved by those big, blue-green eyes that do something special for an eye guy like myself. I can put all the bias aside and just appreciate her for the beautiful woman she is.

Maria is quite the looker as well. And like AnnaSophia, she's also got a certain quality about her looks that makes her special. Maria's characteristic is one where she almost always looks like she's flirting with you. I don't know why or how that is. Something in that smile she always enjoys flashing at the camera seems to imply it. That's part of why I like her so much. She's just sexy in a ton of ways, from top to bottom. Especially the bottom.

Butts

I never thought there would ever be an ass to rival Maria's beautiful bounty of butt. Yet there it is, as full and fleshy as one could ever desire. The weird thing is that it was never there before. She certainly didn't have that kind of potent posterior back when she was running around in bikinis in the one-armed surfer movie. I guess somewhere between that and being cast as Carrie Bradshaw her ass literally ballooned out somehow. Chalk it up as another one of those mysteries of the female body. I wont question it.

They say that Maria used to be fat, back when she was around AnnaSophia's age. I can't confirm that though. All the pictures I've seen of her during this time seem to suggest she was a fairly normal-looking person. Perhaps the confusion there is due to someone attempting to turn normal-looking into fat, as they are want to do in celebrity circles. Anyway, it may be that the great gluteus she sports is the one carryover from her normal-looking days. If that's the case, we should all be thankful for the normal-looking girls.

Hotness

So we've established that AnnaSophia is beautiful and has a great ass. However, in my view, she's still a little more on the sweet side than the hot. I don't know why that is. I look at her and my response is more of an "awww" than an "awww yeah." She's got plenty of time to change that though, so I'm not worried..

For years we've gushed on about Maria's hotness in repeated daily posts on her various celebrity exploits, By this point we have clearly established a profound respect for the remarkable levels of hotness bursting forth from her like water from a busted dam. Reference any of those articles for clarification on our stance there.

Career

I'm going to abstain from voting here, due mostly to a lack of interest in either of the career paths these two have charted. I was never much for the kids movies AnnaSophia used to do, nor am I all that interested in her Sex and the City prequel show, apart from the hot set candids of AnnaSophia it produces. There's just not much for me to go by on this one.

Same thing goes for Maria. I love her, but I despise her Extra show. I also loathe wrestling, which is another thing she routinely takes part in. Clearly I'm of two minds, enamored with her yet completely disliking of the vast majority of what she does. For now, I'm content to simply appreciate the sight of these two ladies and do my best to forget the mind-numbing nature of their day jobs.

Maria

Maria has been a fascination of mine for years now, so it shouldn't come as a shock that I have a bias toward her. AnnaSophia has only recently begun to get my attention, but I'm quickly developing a fondness for her too. A little more time and a lot more of those literal tight ass dresses should even these two up quite nicely.

Just one man's opinion. What are your thoughts?
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