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Face Off - Nude Scene Edition: Alexandra Daddario vs. Angelina Jolie

01.27.2014by: Droz

Looked like Jennifer Lawrence triumphed over Anne Hathaway last week with a healthy referendum on the matter. That dogged anti-Anne crowd remains, no matter what she does. Interesting how polarized folks get over her. Someone should do a study on that.

How has it been existing in a world where everybody knows exactly what Alexandra Daddario looks like naked? Pretty good, right? And I do mean it when I say that everybody knows. I think my mom even watched that shit, which is just disturbing. Before we move on to other things happening in the world of celebrity hotties, I'd like to muse on this topic of great nude scene debuts. Now it's true that Alex's True Detective scene wasn't her debut as an actress. She's been in all sorts of things. She has even stripped down once or twice for a covered nude scene. It could, however, be called her debut as a household name, as apparently everyone and their mom (ugh) has now watched that incredible T&A reveal.

I recall another actress whose nude scene had a similar awareness-boosting effect, which coincidentally also came to us thanks to an HBO production. You might recall Angelina Jolie and her bearing all big break in the biopic movie GIA. Angie got down to all sorts of hijinks in that one - even some super hot lesbian shit with the equally delectable Elizabeth Mitchell of Lost fame. Though it was not her first role or nude scene either, the hot girl-on-girl she did in that movie, as well as the quality of her performance, helped elevate Angelina from a mostly unknown actor's kid to a full on movie phenomenon in no time.

One thing - since we are looking at Alexandra as she is in her modern day True Detective nude scene, it's only right that we establish a level playing field and look at Angie as she was in her movie. That's fairly equal standing I'd say.

So with those parameters in mind, let us now query ourselves as to which hottie with a famous nude scene did it better. Give it a think and vote your conscience below.

Beauty

One thing I had a bit of an issue with in regard to Alex's True Detective reveal was that it was too dark to make out those amazing eyes of hers. Granted, even if she had been better lit, most people would have still overlooked her face for everything else on display in that scene. Those folks are missing out though. Alexandra has got all kinds of wonderful things happening on her lovely mug, to the point where she has become one of my favorite faces as of late. She's just so much fun to look at and adore.

Angelina has quite a kisser too, back in the day especially. Those big, full lips were the sexiest thing ever - the sorts of lips certain less sophisticated people I know might refer to as "DSL's" (I'll let you figure out what that stands for). Her eyes also had special powers, conveying all sorts of varieties of come hither glances. So you really didn't need to see anything more than Angie's face to get turned on by her. Though the rest was very, very nice.

Body

"Wow" is the first word that comes to mind when I've repeatedly gone back and rewatched that scene. That and some indecipherable utterance that's a mix between a gasp and a grunt. I've been looking at naked women for a long time. And while the entirety of Alexandra is just about perfect, I think I can say, without reservation, that Alexandra's tits are the finest I have ever seen. And that's all that need be said on that.

Angelina, around the turn of the millennium, was nothing to scoff at. And were it anyone else over there, we'd probably have quite a tough choice here. Unfortunately for her, you can't argue with perfection. Angelina's body was more than adequate back in the day. In fact, it was very much a sublime experience - especially in her TOMB RAIDER days. But I gotta go with the one who left me speechless. And that's Alexandra.

Hotness

Beautiful face, hypnotic eyes, impeccable body of a tall, curvy and silky smooth quality, as well as what seems like a generally sweet and good natured demeanor - it all amounts to hotness bursting forth like gobs of lava from an erupting volcano. Alexandra's so hot she could burn you alive. That would be a great way to go out.

I'm breaking with the back-in-the-day emphasis we're aiming at here for a second and saying that Angelina will always be hot for me. However, the period around the year 2000 or so was probably her peak hotness thus far. Angie was rocking that crazy sexy vibe so thick at this time, it literally took over the room. It was as though there was a wild sex beast lurking just beneath her surface, ready to pounce on any nearby sex organ. She could have pounced on mine anytime she wanted. And still can.

Nude Scene

It goes without saying that Alexandra's nude scene was hot. So hot was it that my anticipation of the reveal I knew was coming spurred me to immediately jump from the couch the moment she appears from behind that door and sit cross legged mere inches from the TV, literally bouncing with anticipation. It was a spectacle very much like when I was 6, sitting before the family TV in anticipation of a new Sesame Street.

 

It was also just as rewarding a situation. Only instead of learning about letters of the alphabet, I was learning what a perfect female body was all about. Needless to say, the girlfriend was not pleased with my behavior. I'm going to be in the doghouse for weeks to come, but it was worth it.

I recall first getting a gander at Angelina's beautiful young breasts in that movie FOXFIRE way back in the day. Unfortunately most people missed that one, but I'm proud to say that Angie had already made an impression on me years before her GIA sex scenes. However, seeing her romping around with Elizabeth Mitchell, the both of them so gorgeous and all over each other - f*ck me. That shit was hot - so hot that it's been at the top of my favorites for years.

 

The fact that Alex's scene takes the honors from me, beating a young Angelina Jolie lezzing out with the hot blonde from Lost, must make that a pretty damn good scene.

Career

It remains to be seen if Alexandra's True Detective experience will do anything to better her career. Things like this can do celebs miracles in terms of success, or they can seal their fate. Sure, It's not like she's necessarily an unknown, but I'm sure her star could do with some brightening. I can't see how any sane entertainment community could respond to this with anything but a flood of new offers. However, this community is anything but sane. We along with Alex will just have to wait and see how it plays out. I do hope it works out for her though. She deserves it.

Well, let's see. Angelina gets naked and goes lesbian for a bit in GIA in 1998. The next year, she wins an Oscar. Are the two things connected? Sort of, yeah. If she hadn't wowed folks with her performance in GIA, they might not have cast Angelina in GIRL, INTERRUPTED. Or any of the other movies she did after that. She might not have become an A-list star forever, or married Brad Pitt, or had a whole litter of children or moved to a palace in France. So I'd say that movie was huge for her. Let's hope Alexandra has the same good fortune.

Alexandra

I'm a little shocked at how easily Alexandra Daddario took this one for me. I've liked Alex for some time, but I was not prepared for the levels of awesome waiting there under her clothes. I'm still not prepared. I don't know if I ever will be prepared. I'm definitely in awe of her, more so than any other hottie I've seen in some time. Pretty clear choice for me then.

Just one man's opinion. What are your thoughts?
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