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Body Shop: Marisa Tomei

08.25.2008by: Mr. Pink

Before we get to this week's lovely, let me just say that annihilist rightly called me out for neglecting to give ya'll this with the last Body Shop. Moving on. I felt like a bit of Cougar hunting this time out, so I decided to go with an old crush who is starting to raise her visibility again. Used to be we had to imagine her naked. Now we've seen her get thoroughly body Googled by Hawke and Hoffman, plus she's playing a stripper in her next flick. Gotta love: MARISA TOMEI!

Check her out in - The Wrestler

ASS (7/10):

The lower half of Marisa's beautiful bottom is the stuff that dreams are made of. Yet it's weirdly married to a top bit that is the flat and uninspiring landscape of many a skinny chick. I do give her props though since she can get captured in unflattering drawers while on vacation and the keister is still plenty tempting.

BOOBIES (10/10):

Perfectly perfectious. It's not easy to have such a natural cleavage homerun when working with boobage of the smaller variety, but MTom does it with aplomb. And now she seems to be on a mission to prove how good they look unleashed (NSFW). Not a big surprise since they look spectacular.

FACE (7/10):

It's always disheartening to me to start breaking down a hottie and realize that some part isn't as spectacular as I thought. Of course the reason for this is that certain women just have something about them that causes the crotch area of mas pantalones to go all en fuego. So Marisol may not be as pretty as we'd all like to believe, but who cares, because her f*ckability is off the charts.

PERSONALITY (6/10):

Given how protective Tomei is of her personal life it's very difficult to get a gauge on her real personality. The big knock on her is that she's reportedly quite difficult to work with. Since my general presumption is that barring evidence to the contrary all actresses are fascinating, yet annoyingly needy crazy people, this category is going to have to be a little low, but with the caveat that I may not have a leg to stand on here.

CAREER (7/10):

MT's done amazing stuff on occasion, but the brutal truth is that most of her career consists of mediocre misfires. She seems to be on a big upswing right now, though, and may turn out to be one of those stars who really find their stride in middle age and later.

High points: MY COUSIN VINNY, IN THE BEDROOM, BEFORE THE DEVIL KNOWS YOU'RE DEAD, WAR INC.
Low points: THE PAPER, WHAT WOMEN WANT

OVERALL (8/10):

Some women are hot. Some are not. Some fall in between. But Marisa Tomei belongs to a special category of the fairer sex made up of women who you know it would do you no good to get lucky enough to catch their eye. Why? Because the mere flicker of their interest would cause complete and total meltdown of all intelligent processes. No mere mortal could survive it.

Source: MovieHotties
Tags: Marisa Tomei

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