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Body Shop: Eva Amurri Martino

03.12.2012by: Mr. Pink

With three more Shops til this column ends, I'm making sure to take care of business. To that end, for next week's column I'm taking reader nominations. If there's a hottie you want to see featured that hasn't gotten covered over the last 4-ish years, then Drool Back and let me know. For this week we're looking at 2nd generation Hollywood hotness that is now coming to the fore with a bit of force. She may not be turning on Brad and Frank-N-Furter like her mom did, but giving nude lap dances to David Duchovny ain't a bad start either. Let's dive into the delicious dish that is: EVA AMURRI MARTINO!

Check her out in - That's My Boy

ASS (7/10):

As you all should know, I likey the heinie. So I'm hard on it. Just ask my wife (wink, wink). Ms. Martino certainly has a pleasing backside and grabbing onto it is a treat I'm sure we'd all love to share. However, there's a bit of flattitude to it and a slight lack of muscle tone that keeps it from being a true Hollywood treasure. That said, she's really taking her relatively new role as a bombshell seriously, so I'm of the opinion that she's going to earn a higher rating in the next year or two.

BOOBIES (9/10):

Gimme a sec to catch my breath. I mean Wow! This is a lady who is amply blessed in the upper regions. All the more surprising given her relatively slight frame. The only reason she's not getting perfect marks is because she lacks the perfect roundness of a Diora Baird or Salma Hayek, but as you can see here, who the hell cares about such quibbles. These babies are magnificent!

FACE (7/10):

This was a tough category this week, because I think that straight on in pictures Eva is more like a 6. But she doesn't look like a 6 when she's in motion. She gives off more of an 8 vibe. So what to do? I decided to split the difference, because while much of her face is an odd mishmash, she does find ways to make it work. But if you think this is too soft a rating I don't have a compelling argument against you.


Seems smart enough not to put herself out there too much, but if you like Susan Sarandon (which I do), it's hard to imagine one of her spawn wouldn't be pretty damn awesome. She's athletic so that's a plus. Also loved "getting the chance" to play a stripper on CALIFORNICATION. Good for us and good for the hubby right there. I think what I like most about her though, is that she's neither totally trafficked on her mom's fame nor run from it. She's doing a nice job of carving out her own thing and that's nice to see.

CAREER (6/10):

Though EAM has been in quite a few projects, her C/V to date is not her strength. Still, no matter the methodology you can't take away the difficulty of establishing a career in a business this tough. She certainly has the genes to make it big someday, but for now that's much more latent potential than actual achievement.

High points: SAVED!

OVERALL (8/10):

Eva Amurri Martino is a bona fide hottie. She's one of those cases where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, but it all equals muy caliente. At this point it's hard to judge if she's going to be a legit player or more of a fringe treat, but she's got a willingness to get naked and the sort of attraction to indie flicks that will at least keep her career interesting for a decade or more.

Source: MovieHotties


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