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Battle of the Babes #224: The Babes Russell Branded

09.06.2012by: Cherry Liquor

When I went to go see PREMIUM RUSH, there were trailers for all kinds of movies that fit within the demographic that would pay to see JGL ride a bike with no brakes, getting chased by Michael Shannon. The only one that didn't seem to mesh, prompting the audience to groan and check their phones for Twitter updates (one day I will kill you all and your short attention spans!!!) was BRANDED. Seems as if they were disinterested in thinking about an entity that could control their lot in life. I wonder if any of these former flames of Russell Brand feel the same way.

Imogen Thomas

I know little about Imogen Thomas other than than the fact she's turning 30 later this year, used to be on the UK version of "Big Brother," has big boobs, used to bang Russell Brand but is currently knocked up with a kid by her new beau. You can say one thing for Russ, he likes them with enough cushion to withstand the boniness that are his narrow hipbones.

Katy Perry

Russell liked this one so much, he decided to put a ring on it. In the beginning, it seemed as if there was anyone who could withstand the goofiness of that Brit, it was Katy Perry, the SoCal girl who liked dressing up with spinning breast peppermints. But when people are busy and you can't give the man best known for bragging about his sex life enough sex to sustain him, even the best rack in pop music is going to lose that battle.

Teresa Palmer

They met on the set of BEDTIME STORIES, brought together by the dumbed down sense of humour that family man Sandler movies squeeze out of people. Teresa might have gained the sense to break up with him (details are unclear as to what exactly went down between the Brit and the Aussie) but Palmer has a habit of dating co-stars, having hooked up with Topher Grace after working with him on TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT. I'm guessing that Ter & Russ dated mainly so they could trade skinny jeans.

Which babe could you overlook being your sloppy seconds to Russell Brand?

Source: IMDB


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